Upton's All-Stars

Jethro Q. Walrustitty, aka "Walrus", aka "Fur Bearing Bastard"

WalrusHere she is, by popular demand, Walrus the Wonder Cat in all her majestic splendour. This remarkable photograph captures Walrus as she… ummm, well, I'm not sure. As those of you who've been following my work will know, Walrus has been with me for many years and has been a star of my work since the mini-comic days of the mid-eighties.

Since her first appearances she's been a popular character in virtually all my comics, receiving her own fan mail, including one reader who sent a poem "to be read to Walrus". Walrus remained unimpressed by poetry, something we share. Another reader sent her a catnip ball, but I had to throw it out as it got covered in cat spit and it grew mould.

Visitors to the Upton household will tell you that Walrus is a friendly cat, they might remark on her considerable size and that Walrus has a peculiar way of sitting on her backside that drives at least one regular visitor to near hysterics over the cat's cuteness. She is also, officially, the most talky cat in the world, almost anything I do in her presence she finds worthy of comment and some visitors have been exasperated trying to reply to her "meow storm", as I call it.

She loves being combed, pineapple, scones and thinly sliced watermelon. She's getting on somewhat, she rarely ventures outside except briefly on sunny days, she eats and sleeps and plods from bed to sofa to litterbox. She can achieve surprising bursts of speed when catching mice, once lunging after a furry interloper between my legs while I was at the drawing table!

She's been my friend for many years and sometimes when I've been depressed she's the only reason I can find to get out of bed. I have to go now, Walrus is hungry…